Mother’s Day has been one of those holidays I’ve tiptoed precariously around since my mother’s passing twelve years ago. It’s a mixed bag of memories and melancholy, and I know I am by no means alone in this. Anyone whose mother is gone dances that dance as well.
I remember thinking once, when visiting my niece, and realizing my utter delight in her mere existence, that we all seem to be perpetually searching and longing for that – someone to delight in us. And though it seems like something reserved for only our direct bloodline, wouldn’t it be nice if we could practice more of that kind of love with everyone in our lives?
Whom do we cheer on? Whose champion are we? Whose safe harbor are we in stormy seas? Can we love people as much in their failures as in their triumphs? Can we keep our arms open even when we ourselves are hurting? Can we delight in each other’s adult selves as much as we do in toddlers and puppies?
Maybe it’s a byproduct of time that we stop and think about how we show up in life. Maybe that’s because how we show up is our link to immortality. More than any accomplishment we will ever achieve, love is the abiding thing that exists beyond our time here. So we shouldn’t be stingy with either feeling it or expressing it.
And that brings me to…my sister-in-law, Narci, mother of my cherished and adorable niece, Samantha.
It is hard living 3,000 miles away from people you love, but the time I do get to spend is both more precious and gives me a different vantage point than I otherwise would have had.
My niece, Sammy, is effervescent. And what is most precious to her, she shares openly, whether it’s her excitement about a book she’s reading, something she learned in dance class, or a treasure kept in a special place in her room. She is considerate and polite, caring and affectionate, and I can’t help but think that her mother should be given a medal for raising a child with those qualities in today’s world. (And my brother, too, but it’s not Father’s Day yet, so hold your horses, will ya!)
So Narci, please know that you are appreciated and valued and respected so much for making this world a better place by who you are raising Samantha to be and by who you are, because you could not impart qualities you did not yourself possess.
Wishing everyone a safe harbor of unconditional love – to have it and to be it for others.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Mom & Me
Me, Narci, & Sammy 2014